i can see your halo...halo halo

so i started off my week coming off a great weekend! saturday was my bridal shower! at a winery! what better send off to married life then 6 hours spent drinking wine with my friends and family. no, seriously, we were there for 6 hours. even mother nature decided to show. after about 8 days of non-stop rain, she apparently decided it was time for some sunshine…and a sunburn on my shoulder. thanks for that by the way. can i also say that even though i was fully aware that it was my bridal shower, and that i'm engaged to be married (i stare at my ring everyday as a reminder), i still can’t believe that it was really my bridal shower and that i'm getting married. as in married married. like a grownup. does this mean i'm old?

mother's day on sunday was spent with me sleeping at my parents house. when i finally awoke from my brief hibernation, it was time to get things cooking and ready for our bbq. and by that i mean that i basically sat in the kitchen and watched my mom prep food while i started putting together favor boxes. that was probably not a wise move as i spent the next two days obsessed with assembling and gluing boxes. and despite my mother's offer to help, i decided that i had to do it myself. i wouldn't have ever considered myself a control freak but now with this whole favor box situation, i believe there's a possibility i am (maybe that's why i've always hated group projects). so with about 70 boxes down, i only have 130 to go. yessss! someone explain to me why i thought this was going to be a good idea.

on a similarly sad and pathetic note, i spent the first half of the week without my favorite companion – mango….my beloved car (i named him after the chris kattan character from snl due to my car’s constant need for attention and love). yes, mango spent a few days in intensive care given the recent check engine light debacle. anyway, in the meantime, my dad graciously offered me use of his car – a nice lexus SUV, which i’ve driven only once before for maybe 10 minutes, nine of which were spent finding the emergency brake. i figured that it would be a great test drive. i’ve always wanted an SUV and now i know why (earmuffs, mango). my first morning drive into work, i felt like a celebrity…people were waving (granted it was a schoolbus full of 3rd graders but they were waving nonetheless). halo was playing on the radio and as i sang along, even my voice sounded better (it must have better acoustics or maybe it was just magic, i can’t decide…seriously, beyonce, call me. we can record a track inside the car). i struggled with the size a little. i'm not used to being so so so high up…it was like i was in a monster truck rally. ah, but i felt so powerful. get out of my way little ant people. watch out you “sedans”. in any case, it doesn't matter how great it felt to drive the suv because mango is back...and i don't think that my dad could have been in more of a hurry to drop it off and pick up his car. he's [mango] doing great. relaxed and refreshed...oh if we could all just take vacations willy nilly. so now i'm still driving to work singing halo at the top of my lungs but my voice just doesn't sound as good. [sighhh]. there goes my record deal and duet with beyonce.

rain rain go away!

it's been raining nonstop in the dc metro area and i think that the weather along with the fact that people simply cannot drive in this area when there is a drop of rain has made me pretty irritable this week. seriously, i worked from home the other day and was feeling fine but then i had to run an errand. after 5 minutes on the road, i was right back to where i started -- a cranky, mean, ticking timebomb just waiting to scream expletives at people from the inside of my car. yes, i was that woman you saw in your rear view mirror. the one shaking her fist and ranting at rapid speed like a modern day ricky ricardo. it wasn't pretty.

so with that, this week i'd like to highlight all things that have been basically pissing me off.

1. parking lot lady. i'd like to have this lady's license revoked. citizen's arrest! god, i wish i did that. this woman drove about one mile an hour while making a turn into the shopping center before deciding to just stop upon entering the parking lot. just stop. no cars, no people, no visible sign of anything that would prompt a stop. it's as though halfway through pulling into the lot she forgot why she was there.
2. stupid store woman. i think this same lady was in front of me in line at the store. she was buying her items one at a time. yes, that is correct. ONE..ITEM...AT...A...TIME. putting an item on the counter. running her card. signing the receipt. and then putting another item on the counter. i wanted to throw my shoes at her head.
3. kelly from real housewives of new york. someone explain to me why she is on this show...besides to raise my blood pressure. i think my favorite quote from her this week is "it's not like i wake up every morning and say i'm so lucky [long pause] everybody look at me. i'm like oh my god i'm so lucky....how did i get here." i'm pretty sure that is the same thing. i hope columbia has changed their admission requirements because i'm a little embarrassed for them. ugh, why do i watch that show? god, i can't wait for the reunion!
4. check engine light on my car. what the hell is the check engine light? does it mean my car is going to explode? and why is it that one minute i'm driving along and my car doesn't have a care in the world and the next second, it's beaming the indicator in my face like it's a do or die situation. when will they invent a car that isn't so needy? don't i change the oil?? ....ok, so it's due for one but i definitely fill it up with gas every week. what more do you want from me, machine?!

ok, so maybe i wasn't so ricky ricardo after all. i only listed four things! i probably just forgot the other things that made me mad....they're right, your memory really does start to go as you get closer to 30. god help me when i'm actually in my 30s. i'll have to carry around a little card with my name and phone number...kind of like when i was 5. sad.
on the upside of things -- my wedding dress fit this past weekend. it zipped! hooray. so praying while walking at super fast speed on the treadmill is working! hallelujah! oh wait! i remembered another thing that pissed me off this week. the wedding dress owner coming up to me, grabbing my upper thigh/hip area, and telling me it's just "meat" and that i'd be able to lose it. hmmmm, thank you?
god, i hope the sun comes out soon.